2
points
matt89
Joined 61 karma
- matt89 parentIndeed but it feels like a lifetime ago. I miss those days where I would look up to google and their products, as something new, cool and "not-evil".
- I feel very similarly having grown up with a very overprotective and overly attached mother. I'm constantly struggling with emotions and have a lot of self doubt and don't feel like Im in control of my life. Been slowly regaining this control and trying to improve myself via therapy. Unfortunately right now I don't value my parents very much and Im resentful towards my mother. Perhaps that will change in future, perhaps not.
- I think this is a very good answer and trying a similar approach and similar methods has helped me a lot in my life. Few years ago I was very easy to get angry over work and code (especially other peoples code!) and I could stay in this state for several hours. I would also often be not very nice when responding to PR comments.
Also wanted to specifically comment on
> When you feel bad, stop to think. Observe your own reaction and calmly try to realise why you’re feeling that way and what’s your goal. The introspection alone can make you see [...]
That sounds very close to mindfulness meditation - or any kind of meditation really. In my opinion that is also a great way yo get better understanding of oneself and it can help improve quality of life overall a lot.
- Proper and wider research is important. Let's hope that these substances become more popular and available to be researched and tested, so that hopefully in 5-10 years we would know their risks and advantages. Then people could make educated decisions whether or not to try and use them.
- But React is now probably about 7-8 years old. Is it really this shiny new technology that "everyone must jump to"? Yes jQuery devs probably don't get a lot of work right now, and yes you probably should keep up with React itself.
But I don't think that it is necessary to literally switch technology every 1-2 years to keep up, if we can use React (or Vue) which has been stable for a while and is still wildly popular.
- I believe you are overexaggerating. It has always been true that you needed some kind of local server when doing frontend development. There are multiple browser mechanism that would not work in any way other than when rendering html/css/js that was returned from a server.
Consequently a build tool (or dev-tool) that offers you a dev-server is really nothing weird in frontend development world. Same as 10-15 years ago when using jQuery and PHP and you would use XAMPP or LAMPP.
- I don't necessarily think that is such a hot take, but a feeling shared by many of us. And I think that this ties to the title of the post and general discussion - many people (myself included) feel bad when seeing other people achieve something great or extraordinary. It's so easy to diminish ones achievements, I often do it as well, sometimes without giving it too much thought.
But I think its also easy to forget that people in social media (or in HN posts) usually just present the best parts of them. Nobody talks about his/hers bad sides or vices, so it's easy to think that all the other people are great and better than us. In reality most people - like you and me - are probably in the 80-90% of normal workers, be it IT or not, that achieve some successes in life and have some screw-ups as well. What we see in social media is a highly curate 5% of people that shine the spotlight on something great they did.
- > StackOverflow-copying SEO-spam on Google
I believe the parent commenter did not mean that StackOverflow itself became bad, but rather that its content gets copied and cloned by bots and posted as much lower quality content on Google.
So I guess the critic goes to google content filtering algorithms then.
- Different people absorb knowledge in different ways. Just because you learned the most by reading articles doesn't mean that is true for everyone.
I believe there is value in newcomers/junior devs begin in close proximity with their more experienced coworkers because this greatly improves the chance to talk about important work-related topics. Many times in my live I have started a casual conversation with someone at work and this lead to discussion about current work-related software topics and I was able to share some opinions with someone.
These things happen much more rarely when they are scheduled slack calls, and people seldomly just slack to talk about random things.
- I don't really think it was rude. However reading this and your other comments I can see that the way you are communicating (at least in this HN thread) is quite confusing.
Your main comment could be read in a way that you almost hate 1on1's and find them completely unnecessary. But in another comment you said that it's not true - you actually love them.
Now in here you say "lol" and that it was rude, so which is it? are you laughing at this comment or feeling offended?
I don't think it's necessarily rude to point out something that is obvious, without judging. You are the common factor of the 1-on-1's you took part in. They could suck because of the whole organization, or because of the people that talked with you, but it's also possible it's something related to your character or skillset. I think it's worth looking into this and a reasonable feedback, not a "rude" one.
- People can be "alone" but not feel "lonely". But you can definitely still feel "lonely" both while being alone and around others
I think this post addresses the feeling of loneliness rather than any specific alone/not alone situation. And feelings are really hard to get rid of, so it's not actually that easy to just "not feel" something.
Feelings like this should be analysed, understood and maybe slowly accepted as part of life, and then people usually can find some kind of peace and happiness.
- I went through a breakup this year, which was (objectively looking) not too bad, because we managed to end on good terms, but left me personally very very sad and full of regrets. I'm also going through therapy right now, and these two things combined made me realise that I'm completely unprepared for being alone and that I very much resent it and think of being alone as a failure.
And while in general I think that it's great and fulfilling to have good relationships with people, in my specific case I think I was similar to you - I have completely linked my personal happiness to being with someone and I paid too much attention to approval from other people. So I think I can partially relate.
Right now I'm trying to find what I actually want from life and learn how to be alone and at peace. And I agree that hiking or simply wandering around the city alone is a great meditative experience that brings me some joy at least.
I just wanted to say that I believe that with time it gets better, and trying to dig up from the lowest points of our lives is a big and rewarding challenge to have. I wish you peace and love; sending virtual hugs. You are not alone.
- This may be slightly off topic, but it really resonated with me how you expanded on the definition of grief. I think a lot of people associate it mostly or solely with death. But grief, I think, is a very useful concept that can be very helpful in making sense of our emotions in hard moments in life. I was told this by a therapist when I was feeling shitty after my girlfriend broke up with me, and it was quite enlightening to get this new perspective.
I think grief can be basically felt as the result of any loss. Be it loss of a loved one, breakup (loss) of a relationship, loss of your job, loss of a piece of your life.