> latency problems either: if I have a long linked list and snip the last pointer, then we have to collect all of that list. That's going to take O(n) time in the size of the list. For that reason, you'd have to delay collecting the large list right away

These latency issues are inherent to deterministic destruction, which is an often desirable feature otherwise; they have little to do with reference counting itself. In principle, they can be addressed by "parking" objects for which delayed disposal is non-problematic onto a separate, lower-priority task.